Day 59.2: TFW you realize you think you’re in it for the long haul.

STATUS: Same as the previous post. Fixed a few bugs with the event collection I currently had in place. Progress!

MOOD: More optimistic now that I thought through things.

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So I thought about something that I’m pretty sure everyone in my place eventually thought of before.

“What if I just…quit?”

I *could* concentrate on being the best damn employee my employer has ever seen. I’ve done it before, so I’m pretty sure I could do it again.

I *could* get my weeknights and weekends back, since I don’t take my work home with me and my employer’s work-life balance is actually pretty good.

I *could* think about how to pump up my resume and prepare for my next move, even if it’s within the company.

I could have a social life again.

I could go back to having no responsibilities.

All of that would probably happen.

I’d have no real responsibilities.

I’d have no real direction over the bigger picture of my work.

I’d have no real way of *directly* helping society.

I’d have to settle for being a chesspiece on someone else’s board.

I’d have to settle.

I’d have to pave someone else’s way.

I don’t want to settle.

I want to pave my own way.

And even if I fail in the most spectacular way the world has ever seen, debt and all, I can say that I tried. I’d be ready for anything. I’ve even helped some people so far. That’s worth a lot.

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Day 59.2: TFW you realize you think you’re in it for the long haul.